Who are you trying to fool?

I never thought pregnancy hormones would GET to me.. I always thought.. 'nahhhh, it's all in the mind.. as long as you're positive, all should be well!'

And I never thought that pregnancy could make me MORE tired than usual.. I always thought.. 'nahhhh, it's all just because everyone ASSUMES that you're fragile and all, that you 'pamper' yourself'

Boy was I wrong..

WRONG INDEED!! Before I changed to the 9-6 shift, I always thought that yeahh, I'll be able to sit at the office till about 7 or more (when he can finally arrive from work).. I did experience my fair share of going back late before I went to London..

But yesterday... Oh boy Oh boy.. was I wrong!!! by 6.30 when everyone (in my dept) had left, I suddenly felt weird.. I felt tired.. Just even thinking that I would need to do this EVERYDAY until I can drive and have a parking space available to me at work makes me dizzy and emotional..

I couldn't! I almost burst into tears when my MIL called at about 6-ish asking where I am.. I felt hopeless. I wanted to b strong and brave it through.. But I was sooooo tired then.. I couldn't think!! I almost had a migraine just thinking about it! Oh dearrrr...

So he did what I least expected him to do.. he drove here in the afternoon.. left the car.. and went back to work on public transport.. he had to walk 20 mins from the nearest station to get to his office.. In london, walking that far wouldn't be a problem.. but in KL????????? He was already sweating when I saw him to get the keys.. How guilty I felt.. And I didnt even asked him to do it.. I refuseddd and insisted on braving another evening here at the office, waiting..

I wish I could make things easier.... on everyoneeee.... Even if people say that it's his duty to do it to cater for his pregnant wife.. But I can't accept it.. I feel bad..

Seriously I don't mind driving.. But I just don't want to park at open car park areas where I need to cross the road, walk pass the construction area.. I also feel scared for the baby.. and 'our' safety..

Hence.. I'm definitely waiting for a miracle.. That a parking space (inside this designated building near the office) would be open to me on monday.. Oh goddd..

Oh God please..