I was so busy that I didn't even realise it was lunch until Dina msged me. Oh dear me. How time flies. Dealing with work and other matters already clouding my mind is just... overwhelming...
Never in my life will I claim to be the best employee, colleague, friend, daughter, mother, daughter-in-law, wife etc2... I can't. Too incompetent. Me, I'm talking about MY incompetencies. MY flaws. MY mistakes.
I realize I have made many mistakes in my life. Especially towards the people I love or just people around me in general. But being perfect all the time is just... overwhelming...
I long for a place where I can just be myself, and let go.. and just be.. me..
As I'm writing this post, I'm on the verge of tears. But my office phone won't stop ringing asking to set up meetings, status updates on such and such.. How can I afford to be all teresak2 now?? Plus I have a meeting at 2.30pm.. Can't have red puffy eyes now can I?
So all I can do is take a breather, and pray that everything will be alright. Pray that I will be accepted and loved as who I am. Pray that I won't repeat the same mistakes. Pray that I will always remember where I come from, where I'm going, what I am...
Amin..
***** UPDATE ***** after thinking hard and long about all this.. I've decided. My emo'ness may be attributed to my PMS state right now (looking at calendar).. Yeap, MOST PROBABLY. Emo!!
2 comments:
people always focus on their bad traits, when their good traits far outshine them. You're a GREAT mother, an AWESOME wife, and a BRILLIANT employee. Never let yourself think otherwise.
Thanx love... reading ur msg was really helpful haritu when I needed it the most :) thanx luv..
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